Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Theme park (mis)adventure!

32 comments
Dont try what you shoudnt be trying, is what I should have said to myself during my trip to a theme park in B'lore...
Me the great, forgetting how weak-hearted i actually am, went for my team outing to the theme park....


Wow, what a place, i said.. after looking at the various rides, not knowing that it was going to give me ultimate horror shocks and vayatha kalakkals! :D


Here goes my experience...

We went for the first ride, which was supposed to be 'even-the- smallest-of-baccha-will-enjoy-it' kinda ride... My team mates said that it will be nothing at all and will be loads of fun! Trusting is the last thing you should be doing in such instances.. :p


Me, though i was slightly scared, projected an expressionless face, trying big time to hide the fear which i felt.. Bu still, the great lady decides to do it!! "Thats the spirit", my teammates echoed...That moment was nice, believe me, probably that was the last moment which was nice, that whole day!!

So we all settled in our seats, they were locked.. Slowly the feeling, and hence the fear began to sink in.. I was dead scared.. It was going to start.. Oh My God!!! I shouted to the operator.. "Can I get down now??" The operator said that it was locked and that was it!!

Now I was scared to something beyond death!!!! He wouldnt even let me out till its over! What if i faint there? :( What if everything in my stomach comes out? Oh no!! :( :(
The ride starts... First few seconds it moves at ok speed... Its a ride wherein, everyone faces in front, and the whole row of seats move as if a circle is being drawn.. It slowly goes up, then increases the speed and goes round and round like CRAZY!!

I was screaming in fright at the top of my voice.. I tried to close my eyes.. I could actually feel that all the organs in my system were getting displaced from their original positions..I was sure that I was going to die, if I continued there..

At that moment of fear, I didnt even realize that I was the only one screaming.. In less than a minute, all of a sudden a magical thing happened.. The machine stopped!!!!!! I was almost dead.. and relieved as well... The operator came to me, and seeing my plight, asked me if i wanted to get down... Whew!!! Finally!! The 10-12 yr old kid sitting next to me gave a 'whats-wrong-with-her' kinda look... One brave kid I thought.. :p..

I thanked the operator profusely for saving my life, and got out of the death machine and hurried far away from that ride.. Phew!!!

You think I wud have got tricked to taking some other ride after this??
Muhahahaha... NO way! Not a chance! :D

So was a mute spectator/photograher during the other rides where people went up and down vertically at terrorizing speed, where people with high level guts were suspended in mid air upside down, totally at the mercy of the machine..!! etc...

After getting bored becoz of jus accompanying ppl, I decided to go atleast one more ride..the water splash ride.. Thought that this was comparitively better as the shock will last only for a few seconds..
When the boat was moving towards the top, during the final stage, everyone screamed and i joined too... After a few seconds, thinking that it was all over, i opened my eyes, and only then realized that the boat had just started its deadly journey down the hill..!!!!!!!!

Aaaauuuuwww!! I saw the free fall which we were taking.. My heart was in my stomach...My stomach was in my mouth and everything else jumbled up.. I thought that it was the end of it all.!!!.. I was going to either fall from the boat or get a heart attack..!! After a few seconds i realized that neither happened.. "I survived! I survived!! "- I screamed to the other people in the boat....

Went back home with a haunted look on my face!

Thats it folks.. no more experiences like this.. enough for the entire lifetime.. Phew! Tooo much! ...


Wednesday, December 21, 2005

**Switch** **Switch**

26 comments
About switching channels…. :D
Most of us would have mastered the art of switching channels…

That too with most of the programmes on tv which either totally amuse us like the stupid game shows or other mega soaps which simply fail to sustain interest in them for more than 5 minutes, switching channels has become one of the major timepass, sitting in front of the tv..!!


Jus like the 'sms thumb' or the more recently coined 'i-pod finger' there should also be some name coined for this art!!

My everyday Channel switching process …. Here goes...



-> Witness a scene in some soap where a woman keeps running inside a hospital desperately seeking help from someone to protect her from Goondas who are chasing her… She runs to every floor of the hospital and there is a goonda who is hiding in every floor, who are waiting for the camera to focus them, and then act as if they are attacking the girl… Strictly one at a time….
Ugghhh!!!

*** Switch***

-> Some god forsaken game show where they ask 'How many roles did Kamalhasan play in the movie 'Michael Madana Kama Raja' and the person saying that he doesn’t know and asking for a clue.. And the host counting 4 in her fingers as she repeats 'Michael Madana Kama Raja' and the guy, with a sense of achievement saying FOUR!!!!!
Aaarrrrggghhh ***Switch***

-> Switch to a movie channel to find something good… And feel that only a person who has short term memory for 1-2 days will watch the same movie again and again…
For the 100th time….
***Switch***

-> One news channel where they focus people, who shout -"Everythign is because of the police… They didn’t control the crowd… The govt has to change.. "
Huuhhhh *** Switch***

-> Another news where people scream - "The police did a great job Saar… it was the people's fault, solely.. They shudnt have rushed in like that.."
I know…. ***Switch***

-> Change for some interesting stuff of Discovery or History channel.. And you realize that you have seen that documentary SO MANY times that you can present the documentary even without the script … :p
****Switch***

-> NDTV news… hearing the same stuff for the 4th time in the 3rd news channel… :D but its ok… I can put up with this thing even for millions of years! :D
After 5 minutes...
***Switch***


-> Some movie in unidentified language
**Switch***


-> Uuggghhh disgusting snakes..
**Switch**

-> Detectives working on murder mystery.. 11:30pm show?!?!?! SCARY!! :(
**Switch**


-> New year light music programme shot 10-15 yrs back, re-telecast on DD..!!!! The people performing might have even quite their profession..! Who knows.. ;)
**Switch***


-> Some man claiming that he can heal and cure another guy's blindness, by prayer.. That too shouting at the top of his voice…
****Switch***


-> Mallika Sherawat….
***Switch!! ** ;)


-> Kolangal on suntv….
**Aagrrgghhh* switch before I see any 'god-sent-me-to-earth-to-do-amazing-sacrifices-in-every-episode' character!!!! ****

***Switch*** ***Switch** ****Switch***** ****Switch**** ***Switch*** ***Switch*** ***Switch*** **Switch******
PHEW!!!
Reached channel 1 again!!!!!!!!!!!
All in the span of less than 10minutes… :p
So if I tell u that I watch tv for atleast 2-3 hours a day, u can imagine what I would do without my remote!!!!
:D :D
Aaaahh… Its truly godsend!!!!


Thursday, December 15, 2005

On the road to irritation..

16 comments
Top 10 irritations when you are on the road..

1. You are in such a hurry to cross the road, when the vehicle approaching you seems to deliberately slow down.. And you feel like yelling out -"Why dont you go faster and just get
off my way!!!" but on the other hand, you wait and let him go and then cross the road..Huh!

2. You are walking by the side of the road on the pedestrian path.. and you hear big time honking.. you turn back to see whats happening, and you see bikers occupying major portion of the walking path, almost about to bump against you!!


3. If you happen to go somewhere near a flyover under construction..(well fyovers in our country are ALWAYS 'under construction'..thats a different thing..) then you get a feeling that you do a lot of hardwork while going to office, as you cross seven hills and seven seas.. (read: the mud, debris and all the dug up stuff...)

4. You are getting awfully late to office, and you intend to take a rick, instead of walking.. You stop a rick, tell the guy your destination.. As all of you know.. and for those who do not know.. B'lore auto drivers are great 'Thinkers'.. The guy takes one whole minute to think.. YOu are eagerly waiting for his response.. You are getting late.. And finally.. he says- "No Madam.." And I go "Ada cha.. idha munnadiye solla koodaadhu? Google earth software a mandai la load panni destination enga irukku nu narrow down pannina dhaan ivvalo neram aagum..!! HUH!"

5. And finally if you manage to get a rick.. after a few mts, the rick stops for a signal..for 180 whole seconds(3 minutes!!!!) And then finally when the green signal comes up, there will be a moronic guy with a real huge vehicle right in front.. blocking the way, and having all sorts of starting and moving problems!!! You hear unbearable honking from all directions.. and finally by God's grace, when he decides to move, Wah! The signal goes back to red again!!! WHEW!! TOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH!!!!

Well..I am too pissed off to complete the remaining reasons.. as I experienced ALL of the above 5 reasons today morning...Generally on a normal day its a permutation, combination of any 2 .. :( :(
Poor me!

<--Ignore read more-->

Monday, December 05, 2005

Good old Champak!

23 comments
I was waiting in the railway station, for my train... was gettign bored, so made a trip to the book store to pick up something...
Was deciding between Outlook and Business World, when i happened to see this book... A comic book by the name 'Champak' ... Dunno how many of you would have read this magazine...



Well,,, Champak used to be one of my favourite magazines when i was in my class 2 - 5... :D Every fortnight i would eagerly wait for my mom to bring my copy home... :)

I actually had such a huge collection of Champaks that mom made it into bound volumes for me combining 5 copies each... I went down the nostalgic lane.. Ok.. there ends the flashback...!

I decided to pick up a copy of champak and see as to how much the magazine has changed... :) Well... firstly.. wrt the price... It was Rs5/- the last time i read it.. and now it is priced at Rs12/-

Not bad actually... An increase of 7 bucks in 14 yrs... With great eagerness and a lot of enthu...I started reading the contents....

Nothing AT ALL had changed...

The jokes column with the same kind of humor faces drawn around the page...

"Find your way through the maze" puzzle...

"Join the dots" to find out the bird/animal

The center page board game, which i used to preserve by sticking it on a piece of cardboard...

The same "Cheeku Das" comedy strip of a clever rabbit...

The "Know your facts" column which contained all kinds of 'Tell me why' stuff...

All the stories with animals and kids.. with all kinds of morals... Everything was the same...

I was astonished as to how well i could remember the contents as if i had read it yesterday... The stories - EXTREMELY silly for grownups... ;)

A sample:

There was this story about a dad who gifted his son a robot dog...The robot was intelligence personified... One day when the boy was alone in the house, a thief, who called himself his dad's friend entered the house..He gave the boy chocolates which had sleeping pills...
The dog senses that the man has malicious intentions and immediately it goes to the boy's parents room.. it telephones the police and tells them everything thats happening... The police and the parents arrive and the dog plays the thief's activities which it recorded in its inbuilt cam.. and they arrest the thief..!!

Aaaarrrrgggghhhh i went.... and smiled to myself... Wondered how the hell i read such intolerable stuff !! But bet, must have been interesting then...when we were kids...
There was one more where theres a monkey which never shares the fruits of a tree with anyone and how the inmats of the forest teach a lesson to the monkey and it realizes that sharing spreads happiness.. :)

So many strories.. about animals, their forests.. how they lived in harmony... Some moral in every story..

Was a pleasure reading it after a long time, even though u cant expect any kind of logic.. Cumon.. kid magazines right?? ;)

Next came the stage of Gokulam, tinkle, Archies, Tintin.. etc... I still preserve those issues of Gokulam in which my articles were published.. :) Another trip down memory lane...

Even today, if i can get hold of a Tinkle Digest issue.. i wud not leave it till i am done with it... :D Comics are always fun... are they not? :)


Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Some more sleep pleaaaaase! :(

16 comments
Top excuses which comes to my mind for not getting up from bed in the morning...
A herculean effort to prove my point that i have the right to sleep for some more time.. :D
Heres my thought process....

Cumon... :( :( Its 15 degrees outside!!!!!!!!! How the HELL can one get out of bed ??????? :( :(
People must be nuts to go jogging at this time, in this weather.... :X

Let me sleep for some more time… sleeping for a 'little' extra time is not SIN right?? :( :(((


My office is just 15 minutes from my house… And I have this advantage over most others which I should use to the maximum extent possible… Shouldn't I?????

Getting a good nights sleep for 8 hrs is absolutely necessary for good health.. I am health conscious… :D

I am not over sleeping… :( I sleep at 12:00-12:30 after chatting wid my friend and switching channels on tv atleast a hundered times… so I have the right to get up ONLY after 8 hours!!! Which is 8AM!!!!! Ok… sometimes 8:30… :D

What about the exercise schedule my roommate and me planned to follow every morning?We tried very hard.. But simply couldn’t get up early.. And hence concluded that exercises are a gross waste of time and they were sooooooooo boring…. On the other hand, some extra sleep is heaven!!! :D

The thrill in pressing the snooze button 10 times in an hour between 7 and 8am and going back to sleep everytime, knowing that you are NOT AT ALL planning to get up before 8:-8:15.. Is UNPARALLEL… Believe me!! :D

I want UNINTERRUPTED Dreams!!! :D

WHY on earth should I get up… ?!!?!! I will do it whenever I wish!!!!!!!!!

Hmmm… I have to get up… boo hooo hooooo… :(( :((

Monday, November 21, 2005

Money Money everywhere...

15 comments
All these years...
Bulk mail -> Don’t open-> Delete the contents of the entire folder in one go..

Today...
Bulk mail -> Decided to open and see whats there..
Result: Lot of revelations… ( Read: Spam!! )





Came to know about the millions of dollars awaiting me in so many Nigerian Banks like the African Development Bank (ADB), Union Bank of Nigeria, Apex Bank, Togolaise Bank, Standard Trust Bank Limited (Lagos), Eco Bank Nigeria Plc, United Bank for Africa, and the International Bank of Africa

If not for Mr. Abacha, Mr. Adeyemi, Mr. Kabila, or Mr. Green,Mr. Mustapha bank chief auditor, chief security officer, remittance department official, director of the bank, director of finance, or contract award department employee, I would never have known about this FORTUNE of mine!!!!!!! :D


Lottery tickets I have won-> Draw of the Euro-Afro-American Sweepstake Lottery International programsheld on the 13th March in Essex United Kingdom. Ticket number: B956475604545188 with Serial number 97560 drew the winning:01/10/11/18/19/46, which subsequently made me win the the lottery
I have therefore been approved to claim a total sumof US$820,000.00 ….


A Notice from the Office of the Registrar," courteously e-mailed to me that I am now qualified to obtain a Degree-- Associate, Bachelors, Masters, or Doctorate--from a Prestigious University. There are NO required tests, classes, books, or interviews. In fact, only a select few individuals were notified of the opportunity.
OMG! Did I waste 4+2 years completing my grad and post grad education?!?!?!?!?! This could have been an easy way out man!!! Wouldn’t have sweated on the courses, semester exams.. Projects etc…


Some "revolutionary" product with a great message, literally pleading with KIDS..to quit smoking… Chain smokers are supposed to have quit smoking within 2 weeks of using their product… Punchline reads "You began smoking so young… and unaware of the dangers.. Now it keeps sickening you and your family.. Can you still quit??" tcchhh.. tccchh… touching...


Mail from a U.S. Special Forces commando who purports to have found $36 million in drug money while conducting a covert search-and-destroy mission against the Taliban. The "commando" says he has stashed the cash in luggage, but wants to keep it in someone else's bank account "for safekeeping." and he decided to give it to me..


Another offer comes from a man who claims he was delivering a large sum of cash to the World Trade Center on the day it collapsed. Although he escaped from the building, his colleagues believe that he is dead. He kept the cash, kept a low profile and is in great need of a bank account to quietly deposit the money.. and he chose ME!

(** So ppl.. if you want your money safe, you now know what to do.. :D :D ** )

Shocking is the news item is that, the U.S. Secret Service is supposed to have estimated that the fraud costs victims of such spams to be hundreds of millions of dollars worldwide each year. :O
Money money everywhere…. Not a rupee(err.. dollar) to spend.. **sob.. sob...**
**Not talking...**


Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Sania turns 19...

18 comments
Sania turns 19..

The country turns crazy..News channels give this 'extra' bit to the already too much focus on her.. They dedicate hour long shows in her name, giving all kinds of weird info and admiration towards her.

Result: Makes the people who truly appreciate her game, are at their wits end, and start getting irritated even at the mention of her name…



I sit in front of the TV, switching between news channels, when I come across this show..
The news channel introduces her as "Emerging tennis star and a fashion icon!"



20% of the show gives details about all her achievements in the world of tennis..( though there might not be many for a girl who is jus in the process of rising to fame in her GAME! and her achievements are quite marvellous for her age.. )
80% was absolute crap stuff which might cause undue irritation to any damn viewer…

Theres a scrollbar running at the bottom with birthday wishes from so many people around the country...Advertisement statistics, as to how 'Brand Sania' grew from Rs 5 lacs to Rs 1 crore in less than a year…

How her brand value is right next to Sachin Tendulkar currently..
How she is 'the' inspiration to people of this country..
(Were there NO OTHER achievers in this country?!? Jus to name one...What about Narain Karthikeyan who had to struggle to even get a sponsor for his sport… HE is also the only one to make India proud in the racing world...)

There were even top fashion designers brought into the show, wherein they were asked about Sania's dressing sense.. And each damn person spent so much time in commenting about the pinks and the blues which she should be wearing or jeans with glitters! HolyCrap!!! Another one exclaiming that she should carry her on-court dresses off-court too…?!!??

And finally one sensible designer, when he was repeatedly asked about how she shud dress, said that shes a tennis star, and it would be better if she concentrates on her game and play good tennis and it is highly irrelevant as to what designer clothes she wears….

( Why are the news channels interested as to how Sania should dress????? I simply fail to understand...)
Wow! So sania gets fashion designers' expert views for her, on television absolutely free, even without she asking for it..!!!! She surely cannot be blamed for all this...


Then they a girl on the show who has played with Sania in her training classes.. She also being a real good tennis player.. And the kind of questions which were asked put off that poor thing… Inviting a person who plays as well as Sania but jus not being lucky enough to make it big, and asking them as to how Sania's popularity inspired them was totally ridiculous…

And the girl finally exclaimed that her popularity has actually made life tough for them all… Her sister happened to win the $10,000 International level tennis tournament in Pune and that jus occupied an extremely small column in some local newspaper… ( yeah.. truth!!! And even if sania sneezes, it is made known to the whole country!)

Sania exclaims that theres a difference between attitude and arrogance… And what she is made of, I don’t want to debate.. As long as she continues to make the nation proud with her game

And one can never blame her, as for a 19 year old, so much of media hype and attention surely does something!

Looong Absence

3 comments
Generally everyone who abstains from blogging for quite some time, says that they were really busy that they simply couldnt even squeeze a few minutes for their blog..

But my case is such that i was soooo soooo bored.. sooooo very bored, as i didnt have much work to do, that I simply didnt feel like blogging...
Please dont ask me to explain.. :D

Now that i have work to do, i have started blogging again.. :)
Well, from now on, people who generally read the stuff which i generally post, for timepass can continue to do it from here on.. :)
--Ignore the read more --

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

DXBall does it all....

16 comments
Dad complained of a shoulder pain.. And also pain in his right hand!

For all those gaming addicts out there, you would know what I am talking about…Though it was not AOE or NFS which he was playing, it was a game by the name DXBall..Many of us would have played this atleast once in our life…



Continue reading....

A Typical Morning Scenario:
Dad is known to be this extremely punctual kind..whether it comes to going to office or even otherwise…Since dad and mom go together, the standard scene everyday morning is that dad gets ready early and keeps mocking at mom for making it so late.. (Though men never understand that women a lot of unpaid work at home in the morning when all that a man has to do is sip coffee and read the morning paper… but my dad does a bit more... :) )

Nowadays…The situation is reverse… Dad gets ready as usual… sits in front of the comp and starts playing DXBall… Mom has nopressure to start early.. Mom asks dad to stop the game and shutdown the comp and start for office… And frequent statements like -
"Wait.. Will just finish this stage.."
"I just got a 'one-up' and an extra chance.."
"I will surely get another place in the high scoring list today… so wait... :D"
"See how well I am playing… cant stop now..."
are heard...
And finally somehow they start for office…

Evening after coming back from work, mom immediately sits in front of the comp and finishes her mail checking and a small chat session with me.. Coz she knows that once dads back home, after dinner theres no way he will even budge and forgo his computer rights! :D

After dinner dad again settles down to his high scoring spree atleast for 1-2 hours and constantly keep outperforming himself… Whenever he loses a chance while playing, blaming every other person around him for his bad performance :D

And his explanation about how he will surely beat the highest score in the "Score List" someday… as hez the second best at present.. And after repeated requests to come and sleep and the people around constantly distracting him to make him lose his other chances so that he will stop the game… :D

During some weekend when I am at home, I get a whole lot of gyan about all the intricacies of the game, thanks to the running commentary dad gives as he is playing...right from "What this shooting power will do…" "which brick will make increase the speed of the game" "Which brick will decrease the size of the supporting stick" :D

Finally after the painful effects in the shoulder and hands, dad decided that he should stop playing it… And lo! We uninstalled it from the system last weekend… I wonder what dad has been doing for timepass for the last 2-3 days… :) :)

Monday, October 10, 2005

IQ -- 15,000 mts below sea level !!

25 comments
An atrocious game show (or a quiz show they call it..) on one of the Star channels, which I surely HAVE to blog about..After years of Siddharth Basu and Derek 'O Brien, it was my misfortune that I happened to see this particular 'quiz'

Well here are some excerpts of the questions from the person who conducted the show and the morons who answered the questions…

Host: "This question is regarding the republic day of our country… When is it? "
** All buzzers buzz..**
Participant 1: "August 15th… "
Host: "What?!?!?! "
Participant 1: "Its January…January 26th…Oh.. Sorry sorry… I realized I made a mistake!" (Me: Mistake a?!? Adi paavi.. You changed History!! And YOU should be handed over in exchange for Sarbjeet Singh...)
Host: "Oh good… 20 points to you..!!!!!"


Host: "What is the full form of ENT? "
Participant 2: "Ear Nose….. Tongue, I think…"
(Me: Give me the noose.. I want to hang myself..!!!!!!)
Host: "I think you got the 'Tongue' wrong… Slip of the tongue I think… hee hee… I'll give you time to think…"
Participant 2: "Hmm…Hmm… don’t know.. Give me a clue…."
I pressed the mute button not even wanting to hear any atrocious clue being given for this dumb question! Figured out from the body language that the participant anyway didn’t know the answer..
Turned on the volume again…

Host: "This famous lady who acted in hindi movies in the 70s hosts a show whose name goes like this…"Rendezvous with…."
(Instead of asking such a tough tough question.. He could have as well said Her name has 4 letter… Starts with an 'S' end with an ' I' and has 'I' and 'M' inbetween…!!!!!!! )


Host: "Red Indians have their origin in which continent?"
One participant presses the buzzer...
Participant: "Hmm… India...! "
(Me: Please drag these people out of the show.. Or please tell me that it is a humor kind of a show like what Shekar suman hosts…Don’t tell me that these people actually don’t know..!
Saying that Red indians have their origin in India itself is unstandable.. Then calling India a 'continent' !!!!?!?!?!!?!??!?!)


Host: "Hmm.. I don’t think the questions have been that tough.. Lets c, who wins..."
(Huh!! A bunch of morons and you are going to crown the least of the most dumb people in the country...)


Host: "Who played the role of Salman Khan's brother's girlfriend's mother in the movie 'xyz' "
**Buzzer sounds from all directions***
Participant: (answers..)
Host: "Correct Answer..!!! You won yourself a Gift hamper from Fab India worth Rs 9000/-"
(And I go… What?!!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!?!?! At that instant, I lost all my respect for one of my all favourite shops ..Fabindia.. Dunno why.. )

Host: "The winner of todays show gets a TVS Scooty!!!!"
(Me: The one who gets Aamir Khan's onnu vitta chitthapaa's periamma's ponnu correct, will ge the scooty!!!!)

Like an AI system, guess the host/the production crew learnt over time that, to save the 'quality' of the show and do a dhaana dharmam of the prizes given by the sponsors, they need to ask questions according to the participants 'level'...

Then came questions like

Host: "In the Soap 'Kasauti Zindagi ki' who plays the role of…. Blah blah…"
Participant: (answers..)
Host: "Correct answer!! "

Host: "Which directed directed the movie which was the 30th of Some damn actor and also featured..blah blah…."
Participant: (answers..)
Host: Brilliant!!!

In a final tie question,
Host: "Where do eskimos live.. What are their houses called…"
Participant: "Ice houses…"
( As if we thought they live in houses with centralized heating facility!!!!! )
Host: "Theres a specific name to it… "

Question passes to the audience.. And finally one great great soul.. Answers "igloo"
Aah! Finally..But Please… Cant take more...

All the BQC's and MasterMinds I have seen in my life, came crumbling down…
If you have seen a more brilliant exhibition of IQ,.. Please mention…
Phew!


Friday, September 30, 2005

Visit to the eye doctor….

18 comments
A visit to the eye doctor is due when:
-> eyes feel as heavy as the universe..
-> you stare lachrymosely at the moitor and people around you think that you are reading a really senti e-mail…
-> you get a doubt whether things look 20% or 30% blurred…
-> you tell mom all these symptoms and she orders you to go to the doc immediately…

This happens to me once in 6 months.. And this time it was due to the contents mentioned in the previous post..! Yeah the lack of a good nights sleep due to stink…

Everytime I totally dread going to the eye doctor…
What if the Doctor says that I have power.. :((((
Oh no!!! Then me got to wear glasses and lenses are a burden and pain… No way!!

Me asking myself…
Me(Q):Do things looked blurred??
Me(A): Hmmm… I think so.. :( But no no.. I think its only because of strain…
Me(Q): Mom said that if you develop power you will have headaches along with it… Is my head aching?
Me(A): **Thinking really hard** Hmm.. I think the right side aches a bit… But that’s not too much I guess… But what if its power?? :O :(((( Oh no!! :(

At the docs place…
Doc does the general check with the torch…
Then asks me to read the alphabets on the wall..
The alphabets are generally pretty big… I guess that was to test whether the person is TOTALLY blind or not… ;)

Me: **with a real nervous sad face...** "Doctor… I don’t want to have power… :("
Doc: (she smiles): "Don’t worry.. We'll check it up…"

Then comes the computerized testing for checking power.. Which will DECIDE my fate! This is the worst part… But it brings out my religious best too…

This prayer I carry out every time I sit in front of this equipment…
"God.. Please… I know that I should take care of my eyes properly.. I promise I will eat carrots and papaya… I will surely eat healthy Vitamin rich food.. I will do eye exercises EVERYDAY from here on.. I will not watch too much TV.. Please let this machine spare me this time… I should not have power… :( Please…. Pleaaaaaaaaaaase!! :("

The worst wait is the two minute wait after the test, before the doc calls…
Me: "Doctor, do I have power? :("
Doc: "No you don’t… :) Jus a strain on the eye… Eye drops and rest would do… :)"

Wooooooow!!!!! Yahoooo!!! Celebration!! :D
Me: (YOU ARE THE BEST!!) "Thank you so much.!!!!!!!!! :D"
Doc: (smiles...) "You are welcome… "

Got back home...
Applying eye drops is another experience by itself….
You have the small bottle right on top of your eye… Your eyes forced open….Waiting for that dreaded drop to fall right inside… And your poor eyelids fluttering to save the eye from its attacker.. :D

First time I am scared… I can see the drop standing on the tip and waiting to fall, and my heart almost stops…The second time, when the drop is about to fall, I deliberately close my eyes at THAT moment and think "Hee hee.. See I fooled you" :D
Then deciding that I shudnt be doing this if I want my eyes to get ok.. I apply it fast so that the shock is only for a fraction of a second..
:)

And this time I have decided to follow all that my prayers say.. ;)
Lets c……

Monday, September 26, 2005

Those cursed seats!

25 comments
I stare at the montior.. Waiting for it to happen….
Waiting for the magical number to appear….

At the end of it, I could have two different kinds of reactions…
1: "I am lucky!!!!!! I made it… Wowww!!! "
2: "Shit man! Why should it happen to me??? Why me??"

No… I am not describing a casino in Las Vegas…
Its much more important than that...

It’s when I wait for the reservation to happen after I try booking my ticket to chennai and back on the Indian Railways Website…. And wait for the seat number to appear.. :)
The most dreaded numbers 1-8 and 65-72

For those who have not yet figured it out..
In every coach, these form the compartments right next to the toilet !!!

If you happen to get an opportunity to take revenge on a big time enemy of yours get him a ticket in one of these seats and you would have done more damage than what you had imagined..

This time while returning from Chennai, I had this dreaded seat of 71.. Side lower berth… The stink started to make its presence felt in sometime… And I readily had something to cover my nose…
I tried to divert my mind to all the nice things in life…Consicously trying to avoid thoughts about the stink…I didnt want to puke.. when I was interrupted by a guy sitting opposite to me, who was this 'namma-ooru-annachi' types

Me: "TTR eppa varuvaar?" (When will the TT come?)
He: "I think he will be coming in half an hour.."

Me: (kind of taken aback by the response in English to my statement in Tamil...)
"Oh..ok.Will he change the seat if there are other cancellations?"
He: "Yeah .. I think yes.."

My hanky goes back to cover my nose… I am suffering….!!
He: "Have you read this book?" ( points to "Who moved my cheese" in his hand )

Me: "Yeah, I have.."
He: "What does this book say? What do you like about it?"

Me: ( thinking.. ) Don’t you think this is heights of cruelty? Me dying because of the fragrance
around and you are asking me to give a book review!!!!!!!!!!
Me: Its about adapting to change… But realize that its not that practical..
See.. You would have got much better berths in the train previously, and now if you get a stinking berth, then how the hell can you adapt to this change????… Not possible…

He: (Has a 'Business World' in his hand… ) "What do you think about the stock market boom now?"
Me: (thinking… ) Oh God...Why cant a bull or a bear pounce on me and devour me right here?
Me: "Sir, I am not able to talk in this stink.. So please excuse…"
He: "Oh.. Ok ok.. Sorry…"

Don’t know whether his nose had special gabbu filtering agents sprayed, that inspite of everyone reacting to it, he didn’t…

Me took out the body freshner spray from my bag.. Sprayed liberally at the back and front side of my palm, on my hanky too… and covered my face with the hanky and my palm.. "Necessity is the mother of invention" I thought... and tried to sleep…
And early morning, say 1 hour before the train reaches its destination, please ensure that you stay nowhere near those seats…. Please… for your good…

So friends...For those who have not been lucky enough to experience it...in case you land up with seats in the above mentioned range don’t bother losing 40-50 bucks and cancelling the ticket.. and booking another one.. Or get a 3rd AC ticket if travel is not so frequent…

Didn’t sleep the whole night… And came back home only to find that my street had Vinayaka procession related celebration…Fully lit with colour bulbs..and with jarring loudspeakers..! Screaming "We will rock you"! Uhuuhuh !?!?!?!?!
ROTFL….

Sans the stink, putting up with loudspeakers,… I had a good sleep for 3 hrs and reached office late…

Friday, September 23, 2005

Women Hurricanes..,

24 comments
First it was Katrina…
Now it is Rita….
Was wondering as to why the names of hurricanes should be the names of women always….




Asked my friend-
Me: This is not fair.. Isnt it? Why should hurricanes of all things named only after women…
He: May be people have found similarities…Like the how destructive they are…

Me:How the hell are women destructive?
He: Hurricanes are destructive when it comes to land and property… Women generally are destructive to their partner's wallet…. ;)
Didn’t want to give him one of my feminist talks before getting some info on the topic...

Did some googling on it… And found a whole lot of facts about "Naming a Hurricane".. Strange..
It says that "short, distinctive" names are used for easier and quicker communication when compared to the cumbersome "lattitude-longitude" identification methods…
But you could also call it "Adam" or "Fred" or "Charles" right?
Comeon… What are the feminist organizations doing.. I thought? ;)

Then read, that the hurricane list throughout the 19th century and till 1979 had only womens' names… Then due to some protests.. They started using names of men and women alternately… :D
So we have "Boris", "Douglas" and "Simon" too… ;)

And since they ran out of names, they allocate 24 names per year and end up re-using the same name every 12 years..
Like humans, hurricanes also retire… A hurricane name retires and not to be used again if it has caused too much of havoc and the country affected requests the retirement of the name to facilitate historical references and insurance claim activities…

But only the "Women Hurricanes" make it to the news all the time…Reason being???
Are they more sensational? ;)
I know I am going to get interesting brickbats from all the "Men Hurricanes" out there who generally post their comments here… ;)
Well… pheel phree….

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Killing Expedition....

20 comments
My friend who is known to be affected by this 'excessive-indulgence-in-cleanliness' syndrome one day saw two tiny cockroaches running out of one of the cupboards, in our two bedroom house.. She gets frenzy and comes and complains..


She:"You know what??? I saw SO MANY cockroaches in the house… they were running here and there… everywhere…. I saw them come out of the cupboard too…Its high time we do something About this yaar.. "
And I go "Ah! There goes Anshul again.. :)"



Me: "I don’t think there are SO MANY cockroaches Anshul… I have not seen any of them.. Probably one.. That too a small one.."
She: "No yaar.. There are lots...There may be SO MANY more, you know… What will happen if there are SO MANY GENERATIONS of them??"
Me(thinking..): … They will establish their kingdom here and encroach our place….and throw us out…. :D

Me: "Ok…If there are many, as you think, then the next time we go to food world, we'll pick up a bottle of 'HIT' okie??"
She: "Okie…."
Then we get a BIG Mortein Spray which will kill cockroaches, spiders and all kinds of nauseating insects… ;)

Its saturday morning….
Both of us are ready for the mission….
She: "We'll take everything out of all the cupboards.. Keep it inside our rooms… And then spray… 'coz you may never know...those creatures might be hiding in the crevices…"
Me: "You mean take EVERYTHING OUT OF EVERY CUPBOARD??"
She: "Yeah..!"
Me: "Hmmm… ogay.. " ((thinking..) we might have to set the WHOLE damn house right after that…! )

We remove all the cupboard contents…Put them in our respective rooms…
She: "Shall we seal the space beween the door and the floor with papers so that the ENTIRE cockroach khandan will not come running into the rooms??"
Me(thinking...) .. Wait and watch whether we run or they run… :D
Deciding that the idea was too too much of precaution, we drop it…. ;)

Me: "I didn’t even see a single one when we emptied the cupboard..!"
She: "I know.. They are hiding.. They are running inside the gaps which may be there... "
Me: "Hmm.. Ok.."

We tie our scarves as masks and continue alternately spraying Mortein in the cupboards…She sprayed real EXCESSIVE quatity of Mortein in evey square cm of the cupboard, that at one point of time, I thought that the wooden cupboard and shelves by themselves would scream, detatch themselves and run out of the house!! :D

We finally happened to spot one small cockroach, and she went behind that poor thing spraying with HIGH PRESSURE and didn’t leave it till it died!!!

Me: "Hey, I guess we need to spray and leave it.. The cockroaches will automatically come out and die on their own… Its not like we have to go around as if we a re shooting them down with guns..."
She: "Is it?? Ok.. But when will they die..."
Me: "They will.. Eventually… Wait and watch.."

Unable to bear the stink of the house because of the spray, we were tieing our masks tighter and tighter….And after she finished almost the ENTIRE BOTTLE of Mortein… We decide to go out of the house for sometime, till it works…We got out and went to the terrace…

Me: (laughing) "You know what.. Even for a proper household with a lot of area, one bottle lasts for almost 2-3 months… and we managed to empty the whole thing in our chota house in one hour!! "
She: "Oh..ok.."

Me: " We shall SUE Mortein if we find anything less than 30 cockroaches… okies?? :) "
(**there better be lots, atleast for your good...** ;) the ENTIRE cupboard has to be set again!! Aaarrrrggghhh ")

She: "See.. We saw 2 small ones right..? There should have been 2 BIG ones which have produced these.. So we'll try to kill them also... :D"
Me: "Aaarrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhh" :)
She: "Ok… ok.. ;) "

We come down after half an hour and enter the house… We see JUST FIVE very small dead ones…!!!!!!!!!!!! Looked at her, giving a 'where-are-the generations' ?? 'wheres-the-kingdom' ?? Kind of looks… :D She became kind of guilty… Then..

Me: "Ok.. Now that there are not many, If we see one hereafter, we'll kill it with the broom..instead of emptying cupboards..Ok? :)"
She: "Okies :)"

Thus ended our expedition… And we had to light agarbathis everywhere in the house to take the stink away… :D

My buddy provides good blog material.. Doesn’t she... ;)

Happy Birthday Sush….

9 comments
My sis celebrates her Birthday today… :) This post is dedicated to her...

I consider her as almost a kid sister as shes almost 6 years younger than me… and hence am always very protective about her, hence telling her whats good and whats not.. what to do and what not to do.. (whether she listens to me is a different story.. ;))

Before everything, let me tell you, I was the one who named her… :D **sounding victorious **

If you see us from a distance, conversing with each other, then it SURELY it means we are fighting… She is the only person who can irritate me in the whole world and make me shout and get angry… :D

We two are two of totally different kinds.. We are poles apart..

I am this studious kind who would go to any extent to work hard and perform... Shes this total bindaas kind who has to be lectured and grounded by parents, to study….



I dread to even enter the sports ground.. Shes an amazing athlete and wins the championship in almost every sport she participates in….

I am this one who likes to snuggle in bed with a book, in a quiet peaceful atmosphere…. Shes the one who loves to hear jarring music in unimaginably loud volume…

I am the one who is the height of obedience and never say anything other than "Yes, I will" to my parents… And shes the one who says -"Why the hell should I??" in the same situation…

I am the one who'll constantly look at the speedometer and conciously slow down if I happen to cross 30kmph.... Shes the one who can never go below 50kmph…

Sometimes I used to think that life would have been a bit more fun, if I could break the rules like her..

Shes is the fan of so many people, those whom I cant stand! Example.. Simbu… She and her friends were even seen with half a 'blade' tied as a pendant to their chain…! He is supposed to have set a 'trend' they say…Simply incorrigible…! :p

All the fights we've had for the remote when she will never budge from her POGO or nickelodeon.. I am this patient kind and she has a real bad temper! (like my dad sometimes..) How many times, I've pulled her leg saying -"Sush, I have ALL the good genes from dad and mom and you have ALL the bad ones.. ;) "

She'll wantedly do everything to irritate me, and say -"You know, I love to irritate you.. :D" She'll drive me to the border of insanity, the poor otherwise silent me…

For the last few months, since I have become an 'earning sis' , she considers me nothing less than a world bank to fund her.. :) I keep hearing "So you have your card with you right? :D" statement way too often... Though I want to buy much more stuff for her than what i've done till now...

When I was a kid, before sush was born, There was a boy by the name Arun, as my neighbour, who was my age.. He was such a pain and used to fight with me big time.. So I still remember that day when I stood in the pooja place and sincerely prayed to god that if I have a sibling, I want a sister and not an unruly brother… But always tell her that i should have asked for a vampire instead.. ;) or I should have declared all the conditions leaving no loopholes for God… ;)

Every part of it, even when we were fighting, has been real good fun.. Dont know what I would have done without her company.... shes amazingly sweet in a LOT of ways… :)

She doesn’t 'love' chocolates, chocolates which she gets during any of her friend's birthday, she'll directly bring it home to me, coz she knows I love them :)

When teachers in school used to the start the 'sibling comparison' saying that "Your sister was that good, and how come you have this totally non-serious attitude?" She used to come back home and tell that to me very proudly.. "You know, in front of the whole class, my teacher said that my sister was really good.." :) I used to smile back and say-"Sush, good that you feel this way, but the bottom line is you need to work harder… ok?"

Shall always remember every minute spent with sush, whether during war or peace… Not able to believe that she has entered the first year of engineering… Shes still a kid sister to me.. Though I have never told her openly as to how much I care for her and love her, I know that I always do.. And today, on her birthday, i wish she gets the best of everything year after year...

Sent her a gift , to reach her today… waiting for her response… :)

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Adventures of the missing phone....

16 comments
Scene 1:
One fine morning, a group of us go to one of the usual 'Sagar's in Bangalore to have breakfast…
I get a call, and after attending it, place my cellphone on the table, next to my plate…Then I am engrossed in thinking about my plans for the evening..We all leave together for office, and I leave my cell phone behind…

After 15 minutes, realization dawns that my phone is missing… I ask my friend to call my number from his mobile.. Some person picks up the phone and starts talking in kannada.. We don’t understand what he says…We give it to our driver, and he speaks to him… He finds out that the person is a milkman and he happened to get hold of the phone lying in the hotel, and he took it with him, so that he didn’t want anyone to steal it… He said he was standing near Wipro e-city gate.. And can be identified with a milk can in his cycle.. Highly relieved, we rushed to the spot, and there he was, the phone saving 'paalkaaran'.. :) Thanked him again and again profusely for his help…

My phone was given a second life….

Scene 2: ( 6 months later)
Boarded an auto.. Made him stop at the Citibank and the ICICI ATMs for few minutes… heavy traffic on the road.. Inspite of all this, the autowallah, quite an old man, never cribbed.. Everyminute of the journey, I was waiting for it to happen.. "Now hez gonna start cribbing :( now… now…" But it never happened… I was feeling guilty as to why he did not crib.. Had a peaceful trip to office.. So while getting down, I gave him five rupees more, as I felt like…

Reached office.. And after half hour, my friend calls at my desk phone…
He: "Wheres your phone?"
Me: "In my bag!"(I open my bag and search hurriedly...)
"Oh no! not there!"
He: "Yeah.. Knew that.. Some guy picked up the phone and started talking something in kannada…Hey, ask one of your colleagues, who know kannada to speak to him and find out what hez saying…"
Me: "Ohk.."

My colleague speaks to him.. The guy happens to be the owner of a beeda shop.. He says that the auto driver, who belongs to the auto stand near his shop gave it to him as he did not know how to operate, and inform the person who calls the mobile first…He gave the address of the shop…
We rush to the place…

Shop guy: "The auto driver asked me to keep this safe and as he wanted only the rightful owner to take it, He said that the phone had to be handed over only after he has seen the person.."
We were moved by the extent to which he ensured safety…
Shop Guy: "He has gone for a trip now… Will be back during lunch time.. I will call you and tell you then.. As it is not right on my part to hand it over, sir.."

So we left my colleagues number with him and left.. We get a call around noon, saying that he has come… We went there…The auto driver smiled giving a 'here-is-the-rightful-owner' kind of look... Showered thanks to the autowallah and the shop guy...
We also handed over a fifty rupee note as a small gratitude for his help...

Came back only to hear from other colleagues that they have hardly heard such a case of getting the phone back after it was misplaced…!

Hmmm... Nice people in this world still exist…. :) Feels good…
Got lucky twice…. Don’t want to have a third adventure and hence will be extra careful….

Monday, September 12, 2005

Yipppeee! TV at home....

13 comments
Finally, a goodbye to boredom! Have been waiting for this day for quite a long time..
How many days can you go freak out with friends, after a tired day, squandering your money? How many days can you spend without listening to the news on NDTV? How many days can you spend without seeing Agassi or Schumi on TV? How long can you keep missing all our India matches and Formula1.... And how can you stay without making a mockery of the atrociously hosted shows with their themes on TV... The wait is over! Got an LG Flatron Golden eye at home yesterday... ! :)
The process of checking out various models and deciding, that by itself will provide content for one full post But coming back to my TV...



I simply love it! Amazing clarity..Go it delivered yesterday, hoping to see the agassi match.. But it turned out to be a total fiasco as I ended up watching our very own Doordashan! No prizes for guessing.. the cable connection which was there was not activated and the cablewalla is supposed to come today....
Well.. till yesterday, never ever had the patience to even stop by Doordarshan for more than a span of 30 seconds... But new TV... :( Nothing else to watch.. :( So ensured and convinced myself that the programmes WILL be interesting... Comeon..things gotta be interesting..Doordarshan could have improved itself..

Settled in front of the TV.. with my cushions, packets of haldirams and maaza.. to get a 'Gold Class' PVR cinema hall effect... :D
The first one was a tele film.. Expected atleast SOMETHING which will keep me entertained... Sat through the one full hour tele film with a lot of patience.. It was nothing short of ABSOLUTE TORTURE! Not even a SINGLE SOUL in it, could act! Especially the lady who played the main role.. Even if someone went and told her in real life that her husband was in real danger, they cant bring out ONE BIT of emotion from her !!! Then imagine how she would have fared in all the scenes in reel life!
She was suppposed to be a dancer in this, but she would weigh something more than a hundred kilograms easily.. Why the hell do they not pick people for the roles which suit them,i thought... And during all her 'supposed to be' dance programs, they cleverly focussed on just the feet of the dancer.. Obviously, they cannot make her dance..! ATROCIOUS acting.. And am sure that they would have flicked some classical dance clip from some National Integration programme of theirs... :D <>

And her father in law in the film, who was supposed to be a musician, acted as if he was playing he chords in the harmonium.. That was even more atrocious, as during a real slow tune being played in the backround, he hits the chords with whole lot of pace and vigour!
And they even kept focussing this unpardonable thing for almost 5 whole minutes, He was supposed to be really disturbed and was focussing on his music to get back to normal state... But God knows how many people got a stroke on seeing this nonsense...
Finally sailed through successfully and there came the names of the people in the crew.. And 'that' lady, turned out to be the director of the telefilm! NO WONDER! ;)

The channel has not changed a bit, leave alone a byte... Before i even settled down to watch the next programme which was titled 'Cinema Dil Se' which had a three people on a talk show, the anchor, a social activist and a psychatrist discussing about how alcohol is portrayed in Indian Cinema and its evil effects... It defied the borders of boredom i should say...

And finally i told myself.."Well.. you better not mind the trouble of getting your cushions back to your room...Guess thats a better option than watching ultimate crap just because you have bought a new TV... The wait is only till tomorrow evening.." :) Saying thus, I hit the bed...
Well.. now.. jus a few more hours to go... :D

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

The '7' tag

12 comments
Well i have been tagged by Jaggu
And here are my answers

7 things I want to do before I die

Create wealth
Write a book
Become a journalist for NDTV
Go on a French cruise
Visit Hawaiian islands and stand amidst the volcanoes
Sing for an entire day to a person who loves to hear me!
Be a tourist guide to the people from the west, touring India, and tell them the greatness of this country and make them realize their non existent culture! (Feel very strongly about this one... :) )


7 things I can do

Get up early everyday (Well.. I cud try)
Start full fledged cooking
Call my friend and bug the person to the core! ( tempted..)
Try to be less sensitive… (I said 'try' ;) )
Go out and get completely drenched in the rain…( and ofcourse catch cold and fever.. :D)
Spend till my bank balance is Zilch
Shut down my comp now, and munch potato wedges at McDonalds


7 things I cant do

Go on a roller coaster
Eat non veg food
Have a pet (lotsa animal phobia.. :( )
Back bite
Not being scared of crows :D
Take failure easily…
Stay without talking to my mom everyday


7 things that attract you to the opposite sex!!

Trustworthy character
Being Mr Nice
Very good sense of humor and wit
Intelligence
Interesting conversationalist
A bit of chauvanism and attitude
Being very very caring and dependable!

7 things you say the most

Amazing!!
Too much!!!!!
Poda.....
Well....
Chance e illa ! :D
Thaanga mudila......
Aaaarrrrrgggghhh !!
Yean… Yean.. Why…. ?!?!?!?!?!?! ;)


7 celebrity crushes

Shahid Afridi
Prannoy Roy
Schumi
Pierce Brosnan
Zaheer Khan
Derek O Brien
Siddharth Basu

Well.. thats me! :)

Monday, September 05, 2005

Time to take tests!!

6 comments
Happened to come across this particular website which offers 'accessories' for blogs…
Real funny experience I should say.. In case you find it funny, you could even add some of
these scripts in your blog… but me giving disclaimer for introducing this to you.. ;)

These 1 minute quizzes are stricly for timepass.. I saw the list of quizzes and first decided to
go for the 'What does the letters in your name indicate' test….


Entered my name 'Sudha' this is what it gave...
Sappy Unique Delicate Hardworking Artistic

Basically a set of adjectives which were selected at random and displayed…
When I kept refreshing it with the same name.. It even threw words like Slippery for the 'S'
and Deadly for the 'D'… ;)
Since I am really attached to my name 'Sudha Narayanan' and being parama vetti, I tried
it out with that too… The program ran short of adjectives starting wid 'A' and it displayed
'Amazing' 'Amazing' for most of the A's in my name.. :D
Made me grin at the monitor and decided to take more such silly tests…

The next one which looked interesting was the 'Who were you in your past life' test…
You enter your profession and you get to know some random stuff.. This is what I got..

You were: A ditzy cannibal :-O
Where you lived: Quebec
How you died: Consumption ( Did I consume someone and die or did it get eaten up by fellow cannibals??!?!!?!?!?! )
Strange!!

There was one test by name 'Who is your daddy'.. ;) Total wierdo!!!
Enter your dad's name: …. I enter….
Your Daddy is Arnold Schwarzenegger!!!!
You call him : Papi
You love him because: His your muck dad!
And I go.. What the HELL!!!!!!!!!!!

Unable to control my laughter at the craziness of things happening… I go on…

Then comes the 'Wacky Fortune cookie generator'
Only one question asked "Are you feeling lucky Y/N"
I say yes… and the fortune generated is "Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion"
Hmm… feeling very lucky and motivated… thank you!..

For my name, the result of the "French name generator" was Cyprien Fleury
and the "Hawaiian name generator" which sounded more interesting, produced
Kalika Lokelani
Wow!!! :D

Other crazy tests include
"Whats your seduction style"
"Outrageous name generator"
"What rejected crayon are you"
"Were you naughty or nice this year"


And if you still remain sane after taking these tests and find them impressive, you could go ahead and add them in your blogs.. Have seen a few blogs with the "Seduction Style" link though… ;)

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Cookery shows...

10 comments
Please! I HAVE to write about this.. Dont stop me..
The smalll amount of television i see is when i am at home in chennai... Most of the stuff nowadays in TV makes me look at it from a hilarious angle, as i dont understand as to how artifical things can get....

Well, talking about cookery shows... One day, I was flipping channels, not able to stay in one for more than a minute, when my mom wanted to watch a particular cookery show...
These shows are pretty funny...

This is the place where you will get to see 'hand care' at its best!! ... be it well manicured, highly nail-polished hands or a whole bunch of designer hand ornaments.. its all there for the viewers... They know that their hands are going to be 'the focus of attention' throughout the show ......but i still wonder as to who would like to knead a sticky dough with 4 finger rings and 2 coats of nail polish on.... ;)

In these shows, you can clearly observe that the statement "Idhu panradhukku romba easy and odambukku nalladhu kooda..." ( Its easy to make and very healthy too...) will be repeated atleast a hundred times in the course of the show...
Even if they fry it in deep oil or add a liberal layer of cheese on top of what they are making, they will still pinpoint the 20mg of DAL which happens to be present in the content, and say that it has a LOT of protein it... or the stem of the vegetable which they have added will provide an lifelong supply of Vitamins .. or the milk which they have mixed will keep your bones strong even after you die...!!! :D well.. exaggerating...

One more thing which has to seriously BANNED from being said on these shows is "Kozhandhainga school lendhu vandha virumbi saaptuduvaanga... avangalukku romba pidikkum" ( When children return from school, they will really like to eat this stuff) For GOD's sake... its not only children who have to eat, in this world... even grown ups DO EAT..!!
They keep repeating that children will love it, and mention that they are adding every ingredient keeping in mind what children like...
And i really wonder if these people make this for their children when the kids get back home...

Last but definetely not the least, the 'garnishing/decoration' which they do, after they finishing cooking... Half a kilogram of whatever they make will be accompanied by another half a kilo or corriander, cashew, sliced cucumber,carrot,tomato and all such stuff on top of it... and at the end of it, you see a colourful end product, when it is focussed, and by the end of it, you end up forgetting what she had actually cooked... as it will be hidden, under the covers..err.. colours... And i bet all those 'extra' stuff will be treated as untochables after the show...

Theres one incorrigible show on one of our channels, wherein a team from the company which has sponsored the show comes on air, and they are served all the stuff which has been prepared and they taste it then and there.. The cameraman simply refuses to take them out of focus till they FINISH whatever is there in their plate/cup... !!
THE LIMIT I TELL YOU!! :)
Even as i am typing this i am ROTFL.... and hoping that situations would change, but still wonder as to how people put up with such consistent crap! :)

Well.. feel free to comment...i hope you will empathize.. :)

Monday, August 29, 2005

A tribute to Mukesh…

9 comments
The days when I would go to sleep hearing old hindi numbers humming in low volume on Radio(on "Aap ki Farmaish") with the dim night lamp on, is still vivid in my mind. Thanks to my dad, I got to hear so much of it.



This time when I went home, my dad and me happened to see this particular programme on Doordarshan, about Mukesh, on his death anniversary.. Though I am a die-hard fan of Mohammed Rafi, nothing can stop me from penning down the songs of this legend, which has left deep impressions in the hearts of millions of people worldwide… including me...


In the old hindi music industry, which was dominated by Rafi, Kishore and Mukesh in the male voice segment, Mukesh has probably sung the lowest number of songs…(around 1200 songs…comparitively) in a span of 30 years… but the singer has carved a niche for himself very nicely..

Dad was telling me that mukesh is famous for what is called 'straight singing' where there is not many variations(brugas u call them..).. The songs are all plain and simple.. But what makes it so tough is that even a slight deviation from the tune/pitch will be clearly heard and 97 out of 100 people CANT maitain that even for a stanza, leave alone one complete song…

Even a person who has hardly listened to Mukesh, would have surely appreciated some of the following evergreen melodies at some point in their lives…

Chandan sa badan...
Amazingly melodious number… sung with a voice with very very less expressions… but will make you drool over the song, and make you listen to it a million times..By the time he sings 'Ho jaoon agar meinn deewana' I would have already become one…

Kabhi Kabhi mere dil mein…
Starts of with an elegant flute piece, and followed by the simple singing of Mukesh… Singing a romantic song WITHOUT added expressions and getting away with it and the song creating a fan following for him is somehting which is not done often…Seriously!
The song leaves an unimaginable impression… :) One of my all time favourites...

Awara hoon.. & Dil ki nazar se...
I am already running short of adjectives… These two songs beautifully bring out the base voice of the maestro.. Rendered in a highly simple style, He is simply unparallelled in such numbers…

Dil tadap tadap .. & Woh chand khila...
These two duets with Lata Mangeshkar are too cute and out of the world..contains equal parts sung by both… It’s a must listen folks…
Very very sweet to listen to…. :)

Kisi ke muskurahaton pe... & Mera Joota hai japani...
The song with no nonsense lyrics… And a nice foot tapping ,peppy number with nice pace… Gives a real nice feeling at the end of it…

Jis desh mein ganga behti hai..
Nice patriotic number… Have to listen to it to experience the proud feeling which surfaces from within...

The popular Ramaiyya Vastavaiyya... & Dum dum diga diga
Nice ones which you can never ever get bored of….

Ek pyar ka nagma hai…
Must listen… a romantic duet with lata of the 70s… Very tough for anyone to even compose such a melodious tune...

And lots more…

I am actually listening to these songs as I am typing this…
At the end of it I wonder…. Man! this guy sings very very plain and simple! He projects emotions in such a raw and unpolished manner... How the hell did I fall… Hmmm…

I realize...
Its a magical voice.. which has got a mysterious mellifluous sweetness associated with it..
Cant think of ANY other possible explanations… Probably these are what you call 'mystic melodies' ;)

A tribute in my small way... :)


Ps: Even if you cant listen to all of them, I request you to listen to atleast the first two in the list from one of the online music sites… Really worth the time spent, and you will end up appreciating simplicity which is in its best form...

Thursday, August 25, 2005

They take you places...dont they!

17 comments
As I was reading the blog of one of my friend(Sudheer), who had written about the "Economics of transaction with an autowala…" There are a lot of thought provoking issues which one comes up with, when they realize the common patterns in most autowalas in the country.. Be it madras or bangalore…or wherever…



1. He decides the destination…
Not difficult to see such kind of auto drivers…
We: Nungambakkam?
Autodriver: I am going to Tnagar…
( as if we asked him his plans for the day..!!!! )


2. They demand both the to and fro fare, for you to travel one way….
We: (at Koramangala...) Electronics city….?
AutoDriver: Electronics city… very far away madam… I have to return back home all the way madam… double meter….
( We argue and finally settle for 1.5 times the meter rate, as we also feel that it is in the outskirts.. )

Some other day..
We: ( at Electronics city…) Koramangala…
AutoDriver: 1.5 rate madam…
We: Why the hell? You are going to the main city area only right…?
AutoDriver: No madam, we are this area autodrivers… Have to come back all the way…
( Too much!!!!!!!!)


3. Even a small news item in the newspaper about a 'possible' oil price rise in Saudi, could result
in he demanding atleast 5 bucks more per kilometer, and even if you try to argue a little, your
day will be made miserable with his groanings and complaints…


4. In bangalore, the auto meters are set to run at 1.5 rate before 7:30 am and after 9:00 pm… If you happen to get into the auto at 8:45 pm for a half hour ride, then the driver will demand that you pay 1.5 times the rate as by the time you reach the destination, the time would cross 9 o clock!!
After so much of argument, you get into the auto, and after 2 minutes, you wonder as to whether the autowala had put the meter after you got in.. Or it was already running… anyways for the first few minutes you will see that it will show a standard "10 rupees" only… so one cant differentiate… Mental tension all the way...


5. Travelling that last mile…
Not actually a mile :), but the last 100-200m ...
The worst part of the journey, I would say… Obviously we don’t tell the autowalas everything from the door number of our house, to take us there… Suppose we say "17th main" and your house happens to be in the middle or end of 17th main, you are done!! From the time he sees the board reading '17th main' till he takes you to your house, he will ensure that he drives at a mere 2 kmph and keeps cribbing that you are exploiting him and making him cover more distance than what he had expected… You have to console him everytime, and say that we are almost there.. we are almost there....


Pheww!! All this for you paying your hard earned money…. But whatever... they've become our lifeline.. :)


Monday, August 22, 2005

Do you need reasons to send e-cards?

17 comments
When I logged on to this 123india.com site, to send a card to my friend, I had the most hilarious experience of scannning through
the "events" calendar which had almost everyday of the year, with a special(crappy) event attached to it..


To be noted that they have cards for each and every occasioon they have mentioned in the calendar…
I was literally ROFTL when I read them…

A selected few abmormal events, from the entire list...

jan 17th - ditch your new year resolution day (wow! Even before jan ends??)
jan 24th - beer can appreciation day
jan 29 - bugglegum sculpture day (heights of creativity!!)


feb 4th - homemade soup day
feb 11th - grandmother achievement day
feb 19th - temporary insanity day (too much….)
feb 27th - polar bear day


march 1st - pig day
march 3rd - i want you to be happy day (Oh no...)
march 12th - departmental store day


april 3rd - chocolate mousse day
april 4th - "tell a lie" day (right royally?? )
april 5th - bell bottom day
april 15th - rubber eraser day
april 17th - nosy neighbour appreciation day (I like this one a lot.. Don’t now why.. ;) )

may 13th - frog jumping day
may 15th - flip your mattress day

june 15th - a friend in need is a friend indeed day
june 15th - sneak a kiss day
june 29th - remote control day

july 14th - cow appreciation day
july 31st - jump for jelly beans day


august 7th- lighthouse day
august 11th - grab some nuts day
august 19th - soft icecream day
august 25th - kiss and make up day
august 26th - toilet paper day
(Aaaaaarrrrggggghhhhhhhhh…. The limit!!! )

Apart from these, you have other days like
Get it over day
Turn up the heat day
Step in a puddle and splash your friend day
Eat something raw day
Penguin awareness day
Rubber band veteran day


k people... Tomorrow (August 23rd ) is "hug your sweetheart" day... so enjoy..
but please dont fail to visit this site incase of any clarification for celebration...

Friday, August 19, 2005

Speaking of insurance…..

6 comments
There was this presentation on Medical Insurance at office by some guy from a top insurance company with which our insurances have been taken…
The guy was was really good at what he wanted to say.. and this is what happened...

Insurance guy(Agent): We are from blah blah insurance commpany.. We are glad that we got an opportunity to present in front of you people.. Blah blah….

Agent: We cover illness, accident and maternity stuff…. And by accident, I mean anything and everything which is mentioned under the oxford dictionary as the meaning of accident… (Wow!!) For eg. Even if you slip and fall in the bathroom, it is an accident…
** Wow.. If u jus slip and fall and produce some fake bills, they cover you ? **


Agent: But remember these ground rules.. We cover you only under 2 conditions Number1: You should necessarily be hospitalized for 24 hours .... Number 2: The doctor should diagonize some illness/disease or major complication….
**Ooooh .. Ok ok.. **

Agent: And see.. You cant fool us… If you walk into any hospital and tell them you want to do some tests and hence and you want to get admitted, they will be too glad to admit you, as all they want is money.. You get admitted… and they make all tests and your bill comes to around 15,000 bucks.. And then the doc looks at the report and says that you are completely fit and fine…. Then in that fit and fine condition, you need to bear the entire bill.. We wont pay it for you…
**Huh… all plans spoiled! **

Agent: The eligibility for the employees of this company is Airconditioned/Non airconditioned room…. There are two hospitals in the city which have special suites which is almost half the size of this hall… In case you want to take that up, then we pay part of the cost and you bear the remaining…
**One guy is very interested about this suite thingie… so he asks..**
"How much percent will you bear.." and a lot other questions related to it…

Agent: Sir, you generally don’t go to a hospital for vacation… You want to get out of that place as quickly as possible, so generally the suite doesn’t make a difference.. (everyone laughs) Anyways, we bear 80% of the charges…
But the ground rules are.. should be hospitalized for 24 hrs… and diagonized for illness/disease...blah blah…
**we know we know…**

Agent: One more thing… you are free to drink and drive, but we wont cover u if you meet an accident in the process…. (giggles..) or atleast get a report from the doc saying that there was no alcohol in the blood… :)

**the ppt now displays a long list**
Agent: these are the conditions we cover… ( goes on reading every type of diesase/illness ) **ugghh..**
But again , the ground rules…
**aaarrgh...ok…ok… these rules are kinda becoming our anthem...**

Agent: And these are the things we don’t cover…
**another list comes up… felt sick**

Agent: Incase of accidents, for loss of limbs, we have different rates… If you lose a hand, you get back the insurance amount, ...Even in case of a finger, different lengths of finger amputated will have different amounts… the doc has to say that -"the person is amputated to x%" and accordingly we will reimburse…
**Please continue the cannibal talk! Feels great when I listen to cutting limbs...** ugh..

After the presesntation got over, we were walking back, when my HR smiles and asks me -"How was the presesntation?"
Me: "Uggh… kinda feeling sick already… will they reimburse me something for a sick feeling?.. Oh no… How can I forget the ground rules.. !"
;)

Thursday, August 18, 2005

About school days....

11 comments
Well.. Decided to blog about my school memories.. Certain interesting ones here and there right from the age of 3, which have left unerasable trails in my memory… Most incidents pretty funny, but nostalgic…
Year-wise if I start narrating all that I remember about me at school…

Lower Kinder Garden …
We had these small cute colourful chairs and tables of various shapes.. The whole class was filled and decorated with fun stuff! How I wish it stayed that way till the end of our schooldays…

In this particular class, I was known for not keeping my bag on the floor.. Till date, I don’t like to do it… I was told that inspite of my teacher asking me to keep it down, everyday, I never did it, and always had it on my lap… :D
When my grandma used to come and pick me up after school, Ms Yasmine(my teacher) used to tell her -"She safeguards her bag as if she's got lots of gold inside! "
This was LKG…

In UKG, I remember this incident when, half way through the year, our teacher didn’t turn up to school for almost a weeks' time… In school assembly, they announced that Ms Bella, my teacher, was to undergo an operation…
I got so disturbed on hearing that, that immediately after I reached home, I went and sat in the corner of the room with God's photo in front of me, and cried so much and prayed really hard that god should save Ms Bella and she should be back in school..
My grandma kept asking me as to why I was crying but I didn’t tell her a thing... Infact she was a terror as she was known for beating children, with a wooden scale on their knuckles, if they talk in class… She came back in two weeks time…
Was so glad to see her...

Class 1, we had an interesting dance for our School annual day, called the 'Angel Dance'.. I was one of the 10 tiny ones selected for it.. We had a full and flowing dress, in different colours, and they gave us netted wings too… The wings were pretty heavy for me to carry, and it was bigger than me, at that time… Even when I look at that photo of mine, now, I cant stop smiling as to how sweet/comical it was…
I used to fall sick very often, and my teacher Ms Regina Louis name me 'Delicate Darling' at that time… the name failed to leave me till the time I left school…
My absence record in my diary used to overflow with "Cold and Fever" and nothing else…

Class 2, we had Ms Girija, who taught us hindi also… She used to write the letters of the hindi alphabet in such a big font size on the board that I used to be scared of sitting in the first row and even look at them…. But she knew how to manage an unruly bunch of kids…
This was the year when I developed my 'crow phobia' … One day, when I was with my friends during lunch time, a crow flew towards me and took away my lunch… I was terrified by that incident, that TILL DATE, I am extremely scared of crows!!!!!!!! :(

Class 3 and 4, there was Ms Tereza Fernandez, who was an angel in disguise… They way she carried herself, the patience with which she taught us, and her polite and affectionate nature etc etc was more than enough to make her our favourite teacher…
She gave me the "Best Behaviour" award for that academic year… :D I don’t call her an angel, because of that.. ;) Jus tha only one angel can identify another… :p

Class 5 was Ms Joyce, who was not my favourite… She was the kind who was partial and totally biased towards a particular community…
One incident which affected me a lot - We generally sit in the order of our grades/rank , in our class , while receiving the report card from our principal… I used to be in the top 5, and once after the half yearly exam results were announced, and we were waiting for the princi, she pointed to one particular girl sitting in the row at the back, and told her, "You could have performed better than her! Try to do it the next time" It really hurt…but I resolved to do better... And when I finished school and after class 10 and 12, bagged awards, and I went to her and showed them all, as we generally do it to all the teachers who have taught us… She
was in all praises, and said that she was proud that I was her student.. I was happy to hear that from my teacher… :)

Class 6, was fun, as we had a new class teacher every week… Every teacher left after a weeks' time.. Don’t know why, but it we had different versions of geography and biology everytime,,, ;)

We were this unfortunate lot who had their classrooms immediately adjacent the Teachers' staff room…. Thus even a small amount of noise (read: having fun) is enough to bring a teacher to our class… we were branded as the "Unruly class"

The first half of school life was lot of fun… It was the age of crayons and sketch pens…Age when you sit with dad and help him cover all your new notebooks and books with laminated sheets and write names on labels… enjoy the smell of fresh paper from notebooks.. gape at the pictures in the new text books..

Age when we used to go gaga over pencil boxes with pianos and buttons (press buttons to open every segment of the box, which contains erasers, sharpeners etc)…
It was the age of School bags with Clocks and squeezy water bottles…
Age when you graduate from pencils to pens…

Hmmm… Memorable days.. Weren't they?? :)

Thursday, August 11, 2005

From mehndi to body painting….

10 comments
The 'Annual/Family day' of my company was held at Club Cabana, a chill away place in the outskirts of Bangalore! The whole day was filled with fun and frolic, and I got to try some out of the ordinary stuff…

Mehndi…
Mehndi (or Marudhaani, it is called in tamil) is one of my all time favourites.. My perima(aunt) has a huge marudhaani plant in their house, and she makes sure that she picks fresh leaves from there, grinds it and gives it to me whenever I go to their place..

The sheer joy of seeing that bright maroon thing on your hand is simply unexplainable..


The south indian way of applying mehndi is not like what is done up north.. We have no designs as such.. Theres a big circle, surrounded by smaller ones, and caps(we call it..) at the end of the fingers… Even such a simple design, in its bright colour is an amazing contrast to the hand….

Pattu paavaadai (silk skirts..the kaancheepuram one..) and marudhaani, used to be the rage! And how we to retain it for longer hours than the other person, so that it becomes darker…

Back in college, I won a mehndi competition too… not for applying.. :D The girl who made the design on my hand won a prize too.. But I got it for 'The best hand suited for mehndi' hee hee.. Seriously!! Believe it or not! :)

At Club Cabana, there were professionals.. And I got this arabic design done.. Cute isnt it…





Body Painting...
First experience in this area was when my face was painted by Nithya, at the IIMB culturals.. She did an amazing job and had a superb theme too… Now don’t ask me whether I won 'the best face to be painted' award… The best, we felt was the 'chinki' face, its perfectly flat, and has lot of area on which u can paint without any hassle.. :)

At club cabana, there were funky things being painted on peoples' cheeks and hands.. Grown ups had everything from skulls to scorpions and flowers.. All the kids wanted either a pokemon, spiderman or power puff girls… Almost the entire crowd had something or the other…

And I decided to get my Zodiac painted..
I am too attached to this 'piscean' thing that I asked him to paint two fishes in the opposite direction.. He did it so well, that I couldn’t stop admiring it… Here it is…






I wish the pic showed all the perfect and intricate painting strokes which he made in this particular piece of art… It was really nice that he matched the colours of the fishes with those in my t-shirt.. In short, it was nothing short of being Cute and cool… :)

Didn’t have the heart to wash the paint off… The next day, took care to see that it doesn’t get affected during bath, but inspite of being very careful, a bit of it got scraped off... And hence I took the entire thing off… :(


Waiting to get a tattoo done next time… :D




Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Early bird gets the worm??

4 comments
This is one of my favourite calvin strips… :D Had an overdose of Calvin last night, and when I came across this fav one of mine, I resolved to write my next blog about something related to this..



I have become a real sleepy head nowadays… Probably compensating for the lack of sleep in the last 2 years of my post graduation…

The workplace being near the house, is also a major contributing factor for this lazy attitude of mine.. Have seen my friends giving envious glances, as they have to travel for quite a distance, and if they miss their office bus/cab, it takes an Arabian nights 'magic carpet' to take them there, crossing all traffic jams …

Well, this is my rigourous process of waking up... ;)

One thing I religiously do everyday, is to set the alarm at 7 before going to bed.. :D Whether it is of ANY use at all, will be known later in this blog…

Alarm set in the phone, rings….

Me refuse to open my eyes, my hand automatically going to the place where I generally keep it.., make a few attempts to pick it up if it had got displaced from its ideal position… and then with a wicked grin, still with my eyes closed, I think -
"Hee, Hee, I command you to ring everyday at this time.. But do you think I do it becoz I want to get up??.. Not at all !! … sorry.. Its jus to take that guilty feeling off me, and to make myself feel that I atleast 'attempted' to get up… :D, So I shall the put you in the snooze mode, buddy…ring again later.."

The alarm rings for the second time after 10 minutes…

"I know that you are obedient! But pleeeeeeeeeeeease! Let me sleep for some more time….
:( I shall set you to ring at 7:45.. That’s a decent time to get up.. Isnt it?"

Feeling satisified that I wont be disturbed for another half an hour, I doze off again..

Rings after half an hour..
Hmmm.. Now I have no other go! I need to wake up, but still make some brave attempts of convicing myself that I 'could possibly' … err.. Ok ok.. Now I get up…

As soon as I come out of my rug, I get the feeling that the eskimos have conquered my room along with their igloos…!!!!

"Its so damn cold at this hour! How the hell can someone expect me to get up and get ready??? Totally unfair"…

So I snuggle back under my rug..Then I send a 'good morning' message to my friend who is already on the way to office… When I explain this 'unfair' situation, I get a "How-the-hell-do-you-think-I-get-ready?" reply...
Ok.. Ok.. Wrong person to complain to...Then I get mocked as to how lazy I am nowadays… By this time, I am fully awake…

I get ready in around 45 minutes…Only to find my roommate STILL fast asleep, coz she has to leave only at 10:30 for office… So I wake her up.. In a sleepy tone, she says- "Itni jaldi taiyaar ho gayi tu?" Me in a total bragging mood - "Yeah! Of course.. U thought I was like you.?? Never! " ;)

Now, taking advantage of the fact that she doesn’t know a thing about my waking up process, I play this 'active-girl role' and call her names (Aalsi anshul, lazy leo.. Blah blah.. ) Make statements like 'even god cant save u if u are such a lazy goose' … taunt her to the maximum extent possible… ;)
And get totally entertained by the statements which she makes in a 'half asleep' condition! And remember them, add some masala and again pull her leg in the evening about all that she said…

At the end of the day, I am the early bird ! (err.. Atleast in my house….) ;)
and the worm??? Reaching office on time..! "Big Incentive!" huh..
;)