Cookery shows...

Please! I HAVE to write about this.. Dont stop me..
The smalll amount of television i see is when i am at home in chennai... Most of the stuff nowadays in TV makes me look at it from a hilarious angle, as i dont understand as to how artifical things can get....

Well, talking about cookery shows... One day, I was flipping channels, not able to stay in one for more than a minute, when my mom wanted to watch a particular cookery show...
These shows are pretty funny...

This is the place where you will get to see 'hand care' at its best!! ... be it well manicured, highly nail-polished hands or a whole bunch of designer hand ornaments.. its all there for the viewers... They know that their hands are going to be 'the focus of attention' throughout the show ......but i still wonder as to who would like to knead a sticky dough with 4 finger rings and 2 coats of nail polish on.... ;)

In these shows, you can clearly observe that the statement "Idhu panradhukku romba easy and odambukku nalladhu kooda..." ( Its easy to make and very healthy too...) will be repeated atleast a hundred times in the course of the show...
Even if they fry it in deep oil or add a liberal layer of cheese on top of what they are making, they will still pinpoint the 20mg of DAL which happens to be present in the content, and say that it has a LOT of protein it... or the stem of the vegetable which they have added will provide an lifelong supply of Vitamins .. or the milk which they have mixed will keep your bones strong even after you die...!!! :D well.. exaggerating...

One more thing which has to seriously BANNED from being said on these shows is "Kozhandhainga school lendhu vandha virumbi saaptuduvaanga... avangalukku romba pidikkum" ( When children return from school, they will really like to eat this stuff) For GOD's sake... its not only children who have to eat, in this world... even grown ups DO EAT..!!
They keep repeating that children will love it, and mention that they are adding every ingredient keeping in mind what children like...
And i really wonder if these people make this for their children when the kids get back home...

Last but definetely not the least, the 'garnishing/decoration' which they do, after they finishing cooking... Half a kilogram of whatever they make will be accompanied by another half a kilo or corriander, cashew, sliced cucumber,carrot,tomato and all such stuff on top of it... and at the end of it, you see a colourful end product, when it is focussed, and by the end of it, you end up forgetting what she had actually cooked... as it will be hidden, under the covers..err.. colours... And i bet all those 'extra' stuff will be treated as untochables after the show...

Theres one incorrigible show on one of our channels, wherein a team from the company which has sponsored the show comes on air, and they are served all the stuff which has been prepared and they taste it then and there.. The cameraman simply refuses to take them out of focus till they FINISH whatever is there in their plate/cup... !!
THE LIMIT I TELL YOU!! :)
Even as i am typing this i am ROTFL.... and hoping that situations would change, but still wonder as to how people put up with such consistent crap! :)

Well.. feel free to comment...i hope you will empathize.. :)

A tribute to Mukesh…

The days when I would go to sleep hearing old hindi numbers humming in low volume on Radio(on "Aap ki Farmaish") with the dim night lamp on, is still vivid in my mind. Thanks to my dad, I got to hear so much of it.



This time when I went home, my dad and me happened to see this particular programme on Doordarshan, about Mukesh, on his death anniversary.. Though I am a die-hard fan of Mohammed Rafi, nothing can stop me from penning down the songs of this legend, which has left deep impressions in the hearts of millions of people worldwide… including me...


In the old hindi music industry, which was dominated by Rafi, Kishore and Mukesh in the male voice segment, Mukesh has probably sung the lowest number of songs…(around 1200 songs…comparitively) in a span of 30 years… but the singer has carved a niche for himself very nicely..

Dad was telling me that mukesh is famous for what is called 'straight singing' where there is not many variations(brugas u call them..).. The songs are all plain and simple.. But what makes it so tough is that even a slight deviation from the tune/pitch will be clearly heard and 97 out of 100 people CANT maitain that even for a stanza, leave alone one complete song…

Even a person who has hardly listened to Mukesh, would have surely appreciated some of the following evergreen melodies at some point in their lives…

Chandan sa badan...
Amazingly melodious number… sung with a voice with very very less expressions… but will make you drool over the song, and make you listen to it a million times..By the time he sings 'Ho jaoon agar meinn deewana' I would have already become one…

Kabhi Kabhi mere dil mein…
Starts of with an elegant flute piece, and followed by the simple singing of Mukesh… Singing a romantic song WITHOUT added expressions and getting away with it and the song creating a fan following for him is somehting which is not done often…Seriously!
The song leaves an unimaginable impression… :) One of my all time favourites...

Awara hoon.. & Dil ki nazar se...
I am already running short of adjectives… These two songs beautifully bring out the base voice of the maestro.. Rendered in a highly simple style, He is simply unparallelled in such numbers…

Dil tadap tadap .. & Woh chand khila...
These two duets with Lata Mangeshkar are too cute and out of the world..contains equal parts sung by both… It’s a must listen folks…
Very very sweet to listen to…. :)

Kisi ke muskurahaton pe... & Mera Joota hai japani...
The song with no nonsense lyrics… And a nice foot tapping ,peppy number with nice pace… Gives a real nice feeling at the end of it…

Jis desh mein ganga behti hai..
Nice patriotic number… Have to listen to it to experience the proud feeling which surfaces from within...

The popular Ramaiyya Vastavaiyya... & Dum dum diga diga…
Nice ones which you can never ever get bored of….

Ek pyar ka nagma hai…
Must listen… a romantic duet with lata of the 70s… Very tough for anyone to even compose such a melodious tune...

And lots more…

I am actually listening to these songs as I am typing this…
At the end of it I wonder…. Man! this guy sings very very plain and simple! He projects emotions in such a raw and unpolished manner... How the hell did I fall… Hmmm…

I realize...
Its a magical voice.. which has got a mysterious mellifluous sweetness associated with it..
Cant think of ANY other possible explanations… Probably these are what you call 'mystic melodies' ;)

A tribute in my small way... :)


Ps: Even if you cant listen to all of them, I request you to listen to atleast the first two in the list from one of the online music sites… Really worth the time spent, and you will end up appreciating simplicity which is in its best form...

They take you places...dont they!

As I was reading the blog of one of my friend(Sudheer), who had written about the "Economics of transaction with an autowala…" There are a lot of thought provoking issues which one comes up with, when they realize the common patterns in most autowalas in the country.. Be it madras or bangalore…or wherever…



1. He decides the destination…
Not difficult to see such kind of auto drivers…
We: Nungambakkam?
Autodriver: I am going to Tnagar…
( as if we asked him his plans for the day..!!!! )

2. They demand both the to and fro fare, for you to travel one way….
We: (at Koramangala...) Electronics city….?
AutoDriver: Electronics city… very far away madam… I have to return back home all the way madam… double meter….
( We argue and finally settle for 1.5 times the meter rate, as we also feel that it is in the outskirts.. )

Some other day..
We: ( at Electronics city…) Koramangala…
AutoDriver: 1.5 rate madam…
We: Why the hell? You are going to the main city area only right…?
AutoDriver: No madam, we are this area autodrivers… Have to come back all the way…
( Too much!!!!!!!!)

3. Even a small news item in the newspaper about a 'possible' oil price rise in Saudi, could result
in he demanding atleast 5 bucks more per kilometer, and even if you try to argue a little, your
day will be made miserable with his groanings and complaints…

4. In bangalore, the auto meters are set to run at 1.5 rate before 7:30 am and after 9:00 pm… If you happen to get into the auto at 8:45 pm for a half hour ride, then the driver will demand that you pay 1.5 times the rate as by the time you reach the destination, the time would cross 9 o clock!!
After so much of argument, you get into the auto, and after 2 minutes, you wonder as to whether the autowala had put the meter after you got in.. Or it was already running… anyways for the first few minutes you will see that it will show a standard "10 rupees" only… so one cant differentiate… Mental tension all the way...

5. Travelling that last mile…
Not actually a mile :), but the last 100-200m ...
The worst part of the journey, I would say… Obviously we don’t tell the autowalas everything from the door number of our house, to take us there… Suppose we say "17th main" and your house happens to be in the middle or end of 17th main, you are done!! From the time he sees the board reading '17th main' till he takes you to your house, he will ensure that he drives at a mere 2 kmph and keeps cribbing that you are exploiting him and making him cover more distance than what he had expected… You have to console him everytime, and say that we are almost there.. we are almost there....

Pheww!! All this for you paying your hard earned money…. But whatever... they've become our lifeline.. :)

Do you need reasons to send e-cards?

When I logged on to this 123india.com site, to send a card to my friend, I had the most hilarious experience of scannning through
the "events" calendar which had almost everyday of the year, with a special(crappy) event attached to it..


To be noted that they have cards for each and every occasioon they have mentioned in the calendar…
I was literally ROFTL when I read them…

A selected few abmormal events, from the entire list...

jan 17th - ditch your new year resolution day (wow! Even before jan ends??)
jan 24th - beer can appreciation day
jan 29 - bugglegum sculpture day (heights of creativity!!)


feb 4th - homemade soup day
feb 11th - grandmother achievement day
feb 19th - temporary insanity day (too much….)
feb 27th - polar bear day


march 1st - pig day
march 3rd - i want you to be happy day (Oh no...)
march 12th - departmental store day


april 3rd - chocolate mousse day
april 4th - "tell a lie" day (right royally?? )
april 5th - bell bottom day
april 15th - rubber eraser day
april 17th - nosy neighbour appreciation day (I like this one a lot.. Don’t now why.. ;) )

may 13th - frog jumping day
may 15th - flip your mattress day

june 15th - a friend in need is a friend indeed day
june 15th - sneak a kiss day
june 29th - remote control day

july 14th - cow appreciation day
july 31st - jump for jelly beans day


august 7th- lighthouse day
august 11th - grab some nuts day
august 19th - soft icecream day
august 25th - kiss and make up day
august 26th - toilet paper day
(Aaaaaarrrrggggghhhhhhhhh…. The limit!!! )

Apart from these, you have other days like
Get it over day
Turn up the heat day
Step in a puddle and splash your friend day
Eat something raw day
Penguin awareness day
Rubber band veteran day


k people... Tomorrow (August 23rd ) is "hug your sweetheart" day... so enjoy..
but please dont fail to visit this site incase of any clarification for celebration...

Speaking of insurance…..

There was this presentation on Medical Insurance at office by some guy from a top insurance company with which our insurances have been taken…
The guy was was really good at what he wanted to say.. and this is what happened...

Insurance guy(Agent): We are from blah blah insurance commpany.. We are glad that we got an opportunity to present in front of you people.. Blah blah….

Agent: We cover illness, accident and maternity stuff…. And by accident, I mean anything and everything which is mentioned under the oxford dictionary as the meaning of accident… (Wow!!) For eg. Even if you slip and fall in the bathroom, it is an accident…
** Wow.. If u jus slip and fall and produce some fake bills, they cover you ? **


Agent: But remember these ground rules.. We cover you only under 2 conditions Number1: You should necessarily be hospitalized for 24 hours .... Number 2: The doctor should diagonize some illness/disease or major complication….
**Ooooh .. Ok ok.. **

Agent: And see.. You cant fool us… If you walk into any hospital and tell them you want to do some tests and hence and you want to get admitted, they will be too glad to admit you, as all they want is money.. You get admitted… and they make all tests and your bill comes to around 15,000 bucks.. And then the doc looks at the report and says that you are completely fit and fine…. Then in that fit and fine condition, you need to bear the entire bill.. We wont pay it for you…
**Huh… all plans spoiled! **

Agent: The eligibility for the employees of this company is Airconditioned/Non airconditioned room…. There are two hospitals in the city which have special suites which is almost half the size of this hall… In case you want to take that up, then we pay part of the cost and you bear the remaining…
**One guy is very interested about this suite thingie… so he asks..**
"How much percent will you bear.." and a lot other questions related to it…

Agent: Sir, you generally don’t go to a hospital for vacation… You want to get out of that place as quickly as possible, so generally the suite doesn’t make a difference.. (everyone laughs) Anyways, we bear 80% of the charges…
But the ground rules are.. should be hospitalized for 24 hrs… and diagonized for illness/disease...blah blah…
**we know we know…**

Agent: One more thing… you are free to drink and drive, but we wont cover u if you meet an accident in the process…. (giggles..) or atleast get a report from the doc saying that there was no alcohol in the blood… :)

**the ppt now displays a long list**
Agent: these are the conditions we cover… ( goes on reading every type of diesase/illness ) **ugghh..**
But again , the ground rules…
**aaarrgh...ok…ok… these rules are kinda becoming our anthem...**

Agent: And these are the things we don’t cover…
**another list comes up… felt sick**

Agent: Incase of accidents, for loss of limbs, we have different rates… If you lose a hand, you get back the insurance amount, ...Even in case of a finger, different lengths of finger amputated will have different amounts… the doc has to say that -"the person is amputated to x%" and accordingly we will reimburse…
**Please continue the cannibal talk! Feels great when I listen to cutting limbs...** ugh..

After the presesntation got over, we were walking back, when my HR smiles and asks me -"How was the presesntation?"
Me: "Uggh… kinda feeling sick already… will they reimburse me something for a sick feeling?.. Oh no… How can I forget the ground rules.. !"
;)

About school days....

Well.. Decided to blog about my school memories.. Certain interesting ones here and there right from the age of 3, which have left unerasable trails in my memory… Most incidents pretty funny, but nostalgic…
Year-wise if I start narrating all that I remember about me at school…

Lower Kinder Garden …
We had these small cute colourful chairs and tables of various shapes.. The whole class was filled and decorated with fun stuff! How I wish it stayed that way till the end of our schooldays…

In this particular class, I was known for not keeping my bag on the floor.. Till date, I don’t like to do it… I was told that inspite of my teacher asking me to keep it down, everyday, I never did it, and always had it on my lap… :D
When my grandma used to come and pick me up after school, Ms Yasmine(my teacher) used to tell her -"She safeguards her bag as if she's got lots of gold inside! "
This was LKG…

In UKG, I remember this incident when, half way through the year, our teacher didn’t turn up to school for almost a weeks' time… In school assembly, they announced that Ms Bella, my teacher, was to undergo an operation…
I got so disturbed on hearing that, that immediately after I reached home, I went and sat in the corner of the room with God's photo in front of me, and cried so much and prayed really hard that god should save Ms Bella and she should be back in school..
My grandma kept asking me as to why I was crying but I didn’t tell her a thing... Infact she was a terror as she was known for beating children, with a wooden scale on their knuckles, if they talk in class… She came back in two weeks time…
Was so glad to see her...

Class 1, we had an interesting dance for our School annual day, called the 'Angel Dance'.. I was one of the 10 tiny ones selected for it.. We had a full and flowing dress, in different colours, and they gave us netted wings too… The wings were pretty heavy for me to carry, and it was bigger than me, at that time… Even when I look at that photo of mine, now, I cant stop smiling as to how sweet/comical it was…
I used to fall sick very often, and my teacher Ms Regina Louis name me 'Delicate Darling' at that time… the name failed to leave me till the time I left school…
My absence record in my diary used to overflow with "Cold and Fever" and nothing else…

Class 2, we had Ms Girija, who taught us hindi also… She used to write the letters of the hindi alphabet in such a big font size on the board that I used to be scared of sitting in the first row and even look at them…. But she knew how to manage an unruly bunch of kids…
This was the year when I developed my 'crow phobia' … One day, when I was with my friends during lunch time, a crow flew towards me and took away my lunch… I was terrified by that incident, that TILL DATE, I am extremely scared of crows!!!!!!!! :(

Class 3 and 4, there was Ms Tereza Fernandez, who was an angel in disguise… They way she carried herself, the patience with which she taught us, and her polite and affectionate nature etc etc was more than enough to make her our favourite teacher…
She gave me the "Best Behaviour" award for that academic year… :D I don’t call her an angel, because of that.. ;) Jus tha only one angel can identify another… :p

Class 5 was Ms Joyce, who was not my favourite… She was the kind who was partial and totally biased towards a particular community…
One incident which affected me a lot - We generally sit in the order of our grades/rank , in our class , while receiving the report card from our principal… I used to be in the top 5, and once after the half yearly exam results were announced, and we were waiting for the princi, she pointed to one particular girl sitting in the row at the back, and told her, "You could have performed better than her! Try to do it the next time" It really hurt…but I resolved to do better... And when I finished school and after class 10 and 12, bagged awards, and I went to her and showed them all, as we generally do it to all the teachers who have taught us… She
was in all praises, and said that she was proud that I was her student.. I was happy to hear that from my teacher… :)

Class 6, was fun, as we had a new class teacher every week… Every teacher left after a weeks' time.. Don’t know why, but it we had different versions of geography and biology everytime,,, ;)

We were this unfortunate lot who had their classrooms immediately adjacent the Teachers' staff room…. Thus even a small amount of noise (read: having fun) is enough to bring a teacher to our class… we were branded as the "Unruly class"

The first half of school life was lot of fun… It was the age of crayons and sketch pens…Age when you sit with dad and help him cover all your new notebooks and books with laminated sheets and write names on labels… enjoy the smell of fresh paper from notebooks.. gape at the pictures in the new text books..

Age when we used to go gaga over pencil boxes with pianos and buttons (press buttons to open every segment of the box, which contains erasers, sharpeners etc)…
It was the age of School bags with Clocks and squeezy water bottles…
Age when you graduate from pencils to pens…

Hmmm… Memorable days.. Weren't they?? :)

From mehndi to body painting….

The 'Annual/Family day' of my company was held at Club Cabana, a chill away place in the outskirts of Bangalore! The whole day was filled with fun and frolic, and I got to try some out of the ordinary stuff…

Mehndi…
Mehndi (or Marudhaani, it is called in tamil) is one of my all time favourites.. My perima(aunt) has a huge marudhaani plant in their house, and she makes sure that she picks fresh leaves from there, grinds it and gives it to me whenever I go to their place..

The sheer joy of seeing that bright maroon thing on your hand is simply unexplainable..


The south indian way of applying mehndi is not like what is done up north.. We have no designs as such.. Theres a big circle, surrounded by smaller ones, and caps(we call it..) at the end of the fingers… Even such a simple design, in its bright colour is an amazing contrast to the hand….

Pattu paavaadai (silk skirts..the kaancheepuram one..) and marudhaani, used to be the rage! And how we to retain it for longer hours than the other person, so that it becomes darker…

Back in college, I won a mehndi competition too… not for applying.. :D The girl who made the design on my hand won a prize too.. But I got it for 'The best hand suited for mehndi' hee hee.. Seriously!! Believe it or not! :)

At Club Cabana, there were professionals.. And I got this arabic design done.. Cute isnt it…





Body Painting...
First experience in this area was when my face was painted by Nithya, at the IIMB culturals.. She did an amazing job and had a superb theme too… Now don’t ask me whether I won 'the best face to be painted' award… The best, we felt was the 'chinki' face, its perfectly flat, and has lot of area on which u can paint without any hassle.. :)

At club cabana, there were funky things being painted on peoples' cheeks and hands.. Grown ups had everything from skulls to scorpions and flowers.. All the kids wanted either a pokemon, spiderman or power puff girls… Almost the entire crowd had something or the other…

And I decided to get my Zodiac painted..
I am too attached to this 'piscean' thing that I asked him to paint two fishes in the opposite direction.. He did it so well, that I couldn’t stop admiring it… Here it is…

I wish the pic showed all the perfect and intricate painting strokes which he made in this particular piece of art… It was really nice that he matched the colours of the fishes with those in my t-shirt.. In short, it was nothing short of being Cute and cool… :)

Didn’t have the heart to wash the paint off… The next day, took care to see that it doesn’t get affected during bath, but inspite of being very careful, a bit of it got scraped off... And hence I took the entire thing off… :(

Waiting to get a tattoo done next time… :D

Early bird gets the worm??

This is one of my favourite calvin strips… :D Had an overdose of Calvin last night, and when I came across this fav one of mine, I resolved to write my next blog about something related to this..



I have become a real sleepy head nowadays… Probably compensating for the lack of sleep in the last 2 years of my post graduation…

The workplace being near the house, is also a major contributing factor for this lazy attitude of mine.. Have seen my friends giving envious glances, as they have to travel for quite a distance, and if they miss their office bus/cab, it takes an Arabian nights 'magic carpet' to take them there, crossing all traffic jams …

Well, this is my rigourous process of waking up... ;)

One thing I religiously do everyday, is to set the alarm at 7 before going to bed.. :D Whether it is of ANY use at all, will be known later in this blog…

Alarm set in the phone, rings….

Me refuse to open my eyes, my hand automatically going to the place where I generally keep it.., make a few attempts to pick it up if it had got displaced from its ideal position… and then with a wicked grin, still with my eyes closed, I think -
"Hee, Hee, I command you to ring everyday at this time.. But do you think I do it becoz I want to get up??.. Not at all !! … sorry.. Its jus to take that guilty feeling off me, and to make myself feel that I atleast 'attempted' to get up… :D, So I shall the put you in the snooze mode, buddy…ring again later.."

The alarm rings for the second time after 10 minutes…

"I know that you are obedient! But pleeeeeeeeeeeease! Let me sleep for some more time….
:( I shall set you to ring at 7:45.. That’s a decent time to get up.. Isnt it?"

Feeling satisified that I wont be disturbed for another half an hour, I doze off again..

Rings after half an hour..
Hmmm.. Now I have no other go! I need to wake up, but still make some brave attempts of convicing myself that I 'could possibly' … err.. Ok ok.. Now I get up…

As soon as I come out of my rug, I get the feeling that the eskimos have conquered my room along with their igloos…!!!!

"Its so damn cold at this hour! How the hell can someone expect me to get up and get ready??? Totally unfair"…

So I snuggle back under my rug..Then I send a 'good morning' message to my friend who is already on the way to office… When I explain this 'unfair' situation, I get a "How-the-hell-do-you-think-I-get-ready?" reply...
Ok.. Ok.. Wrong person to complain to...Then I get mocked as to how lazy I am nowadays… By this time, I am fully awake…

I get ready in around 45 minutes…Only to find my roommate STILL fast asleep, coz she has to leave only at 10:30 for office… So I wake her up.. In a sleepy tone, she says- "Itni jaldi taiyaar ho gayi tu?" Me in a total bragging mood - "Yeah! Of course.. U thought I was like you.?? Never! " ;)

Now, taking advantage of the fact that she doesn’t know a thing about my waking up process, I play this 'active-girl role' and call her names (Aalsi anshul, lazy leo.. Blah blah.. ) Make statements like 'even god cant save u if u are such a lazy goose' … taunt her to the maximum extent possible… ;)
And get totally entertained by the statements which she makes in a 'half asleep' condition! And remember them, add some masala and again pull her leg in the evening about all that she said…

At the end of the day, I am the early bird ! (err.. Atleast in my house….) ;)
and the worm??? Reaching office on time..! "Big Incentive!" huh..
;)

"Of soaps, and all the hype that surrounds…"

"Tulsi is not going to die .. !" screamed the headines on one of the major news websites….
Wow.. What an electrifying news I thought…

Who is this tulsi…

Someone who fought for the rights of tribal population somewhere, went against the law and had been sentenced to death and her supporters are protesting that such a thing shouldn’t be meted out to a noble soul like her?

Or was it someone who has stood up for some noble cause in controlling some epidemic and prevented a catastrophe somewhere in the world, and in the process got infected with some grave disease and is finally cured…


Hmmm…Well… realized that there is no use thinking about such accomplishments in anything related to what our news websites have to say… She is tulsi….




Now u get the picture? Tulsi is a character in KSBKBT … and for those who havent heard this world famous acronym.. It stands for "Kyunkii Saas Bhi Kabhi…. " ok.. Now u know..

The news item, from mumbai, was about this character being diagonised with lung cancer (in one of the episodes), and there was apparently a rumour that she was going to die, and wouldn’t appear hereafter..

The website said- "home viewers were shocked out of their couched stupor" and "viewers went into collective dismay.The major soap minus its protagonist was Inconceivable and unimaginable"

Give me a break! I thought.. Arent there better things to protest about? Why not protest for the poor municipal infrastructure which which came to light due to the heavy rains there? Why not protest against the hard earned tax payers money( 33% of the nations' which comes from mumbai) not being used for the public property and facilities?

Ok.. Even if u don’t want to protest about all this, going into a "collective dismay and anger" n all, for some rumor about a person dying in a soap, is really really tooo much!!!!!!!

More interesting information given in the article, about this character.. Guess, previously, tulsi had been pregnant gone through a lot of crises and lost all her memory and then, she totally revived from all that…
So the actor says that - "when people have seen things like that, accepting this should be a Cakewalk… "
( read: when people have taken extreme amounts of unimaginable crap before, this seems to be lesser crap to me..)

In one more popular soap called "jassi jassi koi nahin" (sumthing like that..) a news item about the special "wedding episode" of Jassi is being aired on someday… the channel has a special designer for the occasion and she says - " the wedding outfit is a pink lehenga choli with an aqua-orange dupatta. It weighs around 5 kgs, comprising exquisite embroidery and
zardozi work, crystals and semi-precious stones." (total extravagance! for nothing at all..)

And moreover there are celebrities like abhijeet sawant, mandira bedi etc 'blessing' the show with their presence…

** not talking**

As I write this, I can visualize my grandma in front of the tv, watching the 5th or 6th soap for the day, but one thing I know for sure that atleast, she is not the one who goes to the extent of protesting, if some girl tripped and fell down the stairs and is in the hospital…

Hmmm...
Wheres all this leading???? **wondering… **

Annoying yet entertaining ...

Scene 1:
Venue: Citibank ATM, Jaynagar
I am about to enter the ATM place to withdraw some cash..
I see a group of men crowding right at the door..
Me wondering whats wrong.. Thought process wanders from every place right from thinking whether the ATM machine has run out of cash , to, whether some burglary/ security breach has happened there…
Later I realize that they are Citibank agents, marketing credit cards..
I try to get past them and gain entry, when I am stopped…

Agent: Ma'am, we are offering a life time free …. (** I go deaf **)
( I am sick and tired of this "life time free" concept that even if someone actually offers me life time free supply of haldirams or toblerone, I might jus not listen...)


Me: I already have a card, thank you..
A: No ma'am, I don’t think you will be having a life time free … ( I am again irritated...)
Me: I do have a LIFE TIME FREE card Sir, which jus happened to arrive to my address through post, when I hadnt even asked for it..
A: Ma'am but you could try this one.. Its got other advantages like.. Blah.. Blah..
Me: No.. Thanks… Can you please leave way…
Hes kind enough to let me enter the ATM…

After cash withdrawal, I come out, thinkin about how my expenses were growing.. And suddenly I am stopped at the door..
The same agent again..!
A: Ma'am, you could try this life time free…. ( Aaaaaarrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhh )
Me: ( really pissed off, and in a literal pleading mode..) I thought you jus asked me when I entered…
A: ( smiling..) Yes ma'am, I jus gave it a try, incase you had changed your mind..
Me: ** didn’t know how to react ** Please… I have enough number of cards, which I hardly use.. I DON’T NEED ONE MORE..
Guess he took pity on me and let me go…
A: Ok ma'am..


Scene 2:
Venue: My cubicle in office…
I am totally engrossed in fixing a bug which was to go in the next product release…
Some change which I made to the original fix I had given was causing some problem, and I was trying to revert the changes and getting it to work, when the phone rings….

I pick up the phone but continue looking at the code…
Me : Yeah ( asm_t_varp->NLMUnload = TRUE; )

Voice : Ma'am, i am calling from Manhattan..
Me : yeah.. ( asm_t_varp->Quit = TRUE; )

Voice: blah... blah…
Me : what did u say.. ( Shit man! All flags set.. Still this damn thing not working.. Now let me look the other function... )

Voice: blah blah….
Me: yeah….

Voice: ok ma'am then can we send our agent to your office, Today or tomorrow ?
Me: For what??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?! ** all of a sudden becoming alert to what was happening.. **

Voice: You jus said you needed a loan ma'am…
Me: What the hell.. What loan…???!?
Guess she started all over again..

Voice: We have selected you for a pre approved loan…
Me: Wow! I was selected?? Great! And what were the parameters you had, to 'select' me? ( you dial all extension numbers in my floor in sequence and tell them that they are selected? )
Voice: No ma'am, your colleagues have recommended you and your salary certificate, length of stay in the company etc ma'am
Me: Hmm.. Interesting criteria… ( I myself am yet to receive my first pay slip thru mail… been here as an employee for jus a month.. !! )

Voice: So ma'am.. There are a lot of advantages of choosing us.. Blah blah…
I interrupt her in between..
Me: You are more irritating than the bug which is buggin me here!!
Voice: Ma'am?
Me: Nothing… I don’t need it …. Pleaaaase…!

Voice: Thank you ma'am.. Shall call you after a few weeks…
Me: For what?????????? I don’t need it.. I'll get back if I do… please don’t call…please…
Voice: ok..

Phew! Marketing people kill you.. Don’t they !!!! :)